Tuesday, March 6, 2012

*gasp* I never thought this would happen

I've been stalking a fan of Danielle Laporte's since I met her a Blissdom in 2008 (and never know if she remembers who I am so I qualify how I know her EVERY SINGLE TIME because I'm a dork like that) and have been soaking up every ounce of online wisdom she puts up on her website but today... wait a moment, I need a tissue...

Today... while cruising on her website to post something to pop my Pintrest cherry, I saw something on her website and literally GASPED out loud in disbelief.


There’s no such thing as destiny. Life really is what you make it.
graphic via Dotana van Lee, Deviant Art 


Oh. Mah. Gawd.

I don't believe how passionately I disagree with her on this one. The other night I got into a heated discussion with a friend about death and his firm stance on, "Once you're dead, you're dead."

I don't believe that because I've had too many spiritual experiences to think that this is the only life you live or that once you die, that's it. It's my belief and we're all entitled to our beliefs so we ended up hugging it out (although secretly I wanted to smack him around a little, I'm not gonna lie).

Anyway, back to this "no destiny" thing. It sounds a little too much like Sarah Connor's "No Fate" quote in James Cameron's earliest masterpiece The Terminator, where Sarah changes the course of history by killing the bad guy.

Or does she?

Yes, that's my arm and a real tattoo

Last year I started researching the concept of soul mates and came across the Red String of Fate. The belief  stems from a Chinese legend about an old lunar God who connects people by a red thread. The people are destined to meet lifetime after lifetime, regardless of time, place, or circumstances. This magical cord may stretch or tangle, but never break.

What I love about this belief is that it goes beyond the typical "soul mate" connection of romantic love. If you're connected by the Red String of Fate, the person could be in your life as a friend, child, sibling, parent, or some other relationship that you have where you can't explain the connection but it's there whether you understand it or not.

Don't get me wrong. I don't sit and wait for magical things to happen in my life but growing up where I did and being surrounded by the people I was surrounded by, I somehow knew that I was meant for better things. I knew my life would not end up the way other people said it would.

I remember multiple occasions being told that I would "end up just like my mother; pregnant at 18, on welfare, never making a difference."

Whether it was my determination not to end up like my mother or not, I firmly believe my destiny, my path, my whatever you want to call it, was going to lead me away from the life I was born into. There were many times the universe tested me and made me fight to be on the path I'm on now, and many times it would have been easier to choose to end up "just like my mother" but for me, it was never really an option. It's like there was some unseen force pulling me along when I didn't want to get back up.



I believe our lives are like those "Choose your Adventure" books we used to have when we were kids. I was always fascinated with them and now I see why. The choices we make lead us on different journeys in our life; whatever fate or destiny the universe has in store for us is there but it's up to us to see the signs and make the choice.

So, Danielle, I adore you and think you're brilliant but on this one, I respectfully disagree.

What do you think? Do you believe there is no fate? Let me know, I'm curious to find out your thoughts.


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3 comments:

  1. I believe we have a destiny...however WE guide it through our choices and our attitudes. The question is, do we fulfill that destiny? No? Well get ready for another go round. Just my honest and SPARKLY opinion :P

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  2. I agree oh Sparkly one :D It's a fascinating topic tho!! Makes for interesting discussion :)

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  3. I love this topic Tamara. I totally believe in fate, sacred contracts and in creating our reality through our choices and attitudes. In my opinion, life is complicated, there have been so many things that have happened in my life that I can't explain or that I do not understand. For that reason, I really believe that there is no one thing in particular that makes up all of our experiences. Those are my two bits... xo Carmen

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